Project Manager

OK-I confess. I procrastinated on lil brother's 3rd grade zoology project. Little did I know that I would have an appointment on the eve prior to our deadline (one worse than being project manager, actually). So knowing that Mr B would have to take over this honored position, I began nagging and threatening 24 hours prior to deadline in hopes that this project would be done before I got home from my dreaded appointment. No dice. They hadn't even started. And all (un)involved parties seemed to have this deadpan, quizzical look (who me? project? what project?) as I began barking orders. As I left them to their business, I overheard Mr B say to lil brother, "Here read this 10 page report on pandas. It'll tell you everything you need to know."

So I'm trying to relax-but all I can think about is the panda project-and lil brother trying to decipher that 10 page report from the Internet. So I drag myself outta bed and go dig out color paper, glue, markers, and a glossy picture of a panda eating bamboo from the art cart. And when I hand over these supplies (with a few well intentioned suggestions for improvement), I notice that the only supply lil brother and Mr B are using....is the good ol' pencil. And Mr B does not look happy AT ALL about the art supplies I provide and seems to get irritated when I remind them that the poster actually needs to look good as well as be informative.

Here's what so shocking about the dad-project-manager: they actually let the kid do (or not) the work himself (messy handwriting and all), and they don't even care what it looks like-or that there will be stiff competition for "best poster"-a coveted award in mom circles. Take little Suzie's mother, for example. She's a professional scrapbooker who has won global awards in the third grade category, spent $132.59 on the project, took it to Kinkos for laminating, interviewed scientists from the local zoo, made cupcakes in the shape of her animal for the entire class, and has been perfecting Suzie's delivery for two weeks. Getting it done is the man-mission objective. Screw the art supplies. And lil Suzie's scrapbooking mama.

I might just email Ms N and tell her I was out of the country for this project. Maybe that'll earn us a few sympathy points...we are sooooooo screwed.