Wednesday, April 3, 2013

Yoohoo! ... Honey! I'm Home...

Ok-it's been awhile... like forever, I know.  Honestly, I didn't even know if I still knew my password.  Et voila!  Here I am...  My last few menopausal synapses are firing.... for now.

As for my virtual disappearance, I experienced a Renaissance moment and went all rustic-retro:  as in actually paying attention to real people around me instead of dwelling in the subterranean snarky murk of cyber space.  And it's been refreshing, actually.  I have to say the air is cleaner and more refreshing in the land of real time/real people-albeit more exhausting and frustrating.  We all know that  staying present in your real life requires more courage and persistence than liking another e-card making fun of whackadoos. 

Here are a few hilites from my rustic-retro-hiatus:

Big kid turned 15 and had a massive teenage party.  Did you know that having 30 teenagers at your house feels like having 175 chimps hang out in your living room???  It was practically a rave party... with adult supervision.  Mr B was on glare-patrol the entire event.  He was also the unofficial music Nazi.  "Did you hear those lyrics???" he accuses me as I'm be-bopping to the base beat handing out glow sticks, totally oblivious, as he marches off to unplug the offending I-Pod.  He also sent lil brother on reconnaissance missions to the bonus room to make sure no "funny business" was happening on his watch.  As a result lil brother ended up in the middle of a mosh pit, totally stoked and ready to get his PAR-TEE ON!  All the kids had a blast, but I'm not sure Mr B and I have what it takes to do that again.

Oh!  And at the last lady party I attended, somebody got mad, somebody cried, and somebody puked.  When's the last time you were in a crowded powder room with 5 people having a good sympathy puke...???   Good times!!!  No lie...

Just to let you know I still have my priorities in order, I spent a fortune having my stylist put in a bucket load of reddish-blonde hilites (Sweet Mary-I have pole hair, y'all!), and Easter weekend officially kicked off my spring pedicure:  Spicy Shrimp is my color of choice!

Oh, and Mr B has given me a new stripper name:  Chardonnay-nay!!!  More on her later...

Laws y'all...!   Typing all this has been exhausting...  gotta go smoke a cig now...

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