EFL

OK-I am gonna go here. Although I know I shouldn’t (classic blither blather fashion). I mean-every woman needs a little psycho-drama while doing the laundry, right? So here it is: I have an Enemy for Life (EFL). Exciting, right? Glamorous, you say? For the record: an annoying pain in the ass. Because my EFL is of the psycho variety (think Glenn Close in Fatal Attraction). I couldn’t just get the run of the mill garden variety EFL. Oh no-not my luck-this one is a real piece of work: the stalker, single white female version. And this one is not gonna go away. This EFL is needy and clingy like a dryer sheet stuck to your pants leg (trying to shake it off does no good...sigh). She desperately needs my attention. So I’m gonna learn to live with her. Maybe even try to appreciate her twisted psychosis (carefully while looking over my shoulder). I mean-she IS persistent and determined, and I do admire a real go-getter (EFL is probably reading this as we speak… creepy, huh???). And I guess it does give me bragging rights. How many of you have inspired such loyalty in your enemies? So if you’re a gamblin' gal, the odds of finding a bloody rabbit boiling in a pot on my stove is better than average. Place your bets now with your bookie. But hey-a little rabbit stew with onion and carrots and gravy might not be such a bad idea after all. All we need is a nice dry red wine while kicking back and watching the crazy show... And who am I to deny someone her raison d’etre?

So here’s a toast to my EFL: You’re a one of kind crazy-ass-b*tch! Now: go get a hobby. Or bleach your whites.

Btw-Fatal Attraction is one of my all time fav movies! A here-to-stay cult classic thriller. Put it on your Netflix list. You won’t be sorry! Mr B and I will be watching it this week (research purposes for me).

Always forgive your enemies - nothing annoys them so much.” Oscar Wilde