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My hater-rade is in full lather.  And my friends are thrilled (one is terrified).

My bff commented on this at 7:42 AM on Thursday after I had already labeled three misinformed folks "IDIOTS!"-all before even quaffing my first cuppa joe.  "Thank God you're BACK!" she rejoiced.

And sure enough, I was foaming at the mouth the next afternoon over a STUPID! STUPID! email.  And this time the f-bombs were flying with GD force.

My crazy eye has also warmed up.  I found myself scanning a group of squirrely kids while little clicks and whirrs and buzzing sounds prepared a WTF! torpedo launch.  Saved by the bell... by a nanosecond.

This whole going-back-to-work gig is just irritatin', y'all.   Evenly applying my Cover Girl foundation e'ry freakin day, accessorizing for the younger crowd, packing boring lunches, and frantically kicking the copier's ass and deleting stupid as f*ck emails while politely answering 97,251 questions every 3 minutes through clenched teeth ain't no lil thing, y'all.  I guess I got a little too comfortable with lounging in my bath robe, cradling my left boob with pillows, and popping oxy's while watching Housewives from 10 AM-9 PM.  Cancer does have its perks, is all I'm sayin.' 

Mr B is gonna have to buy me a lottery ticket...  TODAY.  Or I just need to be a chain smoker. 

Whatev...